the feeling of inspiration comes through different bursts of light that comes every so often to me. these days the only inspiration i am getting is for projects that i am able to only do in the coming future. this moment, right now, at two am, i am uninspired to do anything. anything at all. no homework. no work. no art. no writing. no editing. no nothing. all i feel like doing and wanting to do is lay beneath the stars either quietly by myself, or with a friend who can assist me by letting me rest my thoughts and my head and my heart on to them without being judged. i fear that the reason of my lack of inspiration is due to the fear of judgement of others, as well as the lack of time i have to complete anything. the fear of being judged is something i have always struggled with, that is the reason for not many of my friends or family members knowing about this blog. i am paranoid that if they found this out, they may decode some of thoughts and feelings that i wish only few to know or none at all. yet, here i am expressing my fear of being uninspired and being judged by others. it has been a few months since this has started to occur. i hope the inspiration and motivation comes back sometime soon. the next few weeks are going to be the most stressful but i have to get through them somehow.